Good News And Bad News

I had a soccer game yesterday and my hip didn't hurt at all which is amazing! I was so happy and I couldn't wait to write about it on my blog! But, obviously, something bad HAD to happen to me. During the game, I jumped in the air to hit the ball with my head and fell down on my ankle, completely twisting it to the point where I couldn't even move it. I stayed on the bench for a few minutes before going back on even though it still did hurt. After that, I had a hockey practice and today again, I had a hockey practice. My ankle constantly hurts but I know it's something that will fade away soon enough so I'm not too worried about it. At least I know my hip is getting better!

I Won't Give Up

For the times where I really felt like running but couldn't, I biked instead. Each time, it would give me at least an hour to listen to my music and think about many things like how school was starting soon, etc. I actually did enjoy these moments I spent with myself, but I always thought it was quite different from running and never really enjoyed it as much. I biked 26km two other times since the first and I still never really found joy in that activity. For me, it was just like spending an hour, sitting on a chair, listening to music. Except for your leg muscles, nothing else is really being pushed. And I like to push myself!
After going to the physio Tuesday night this week, he told me things were getting really better. He even looked impressed with the progress that had been made and said I could run again! Oh the joy! After hearing that, right away I planned when exactly I would go and how long and where... The next morning, I woke up slowly, ate a good breakfast then put my super woman costume on and zoomed out of the house. I was smart enough not to push myself too hard and ran for 2 minutes, then walked for 1, alternating like that the whole way through for 3km at a slow pace during 19 minutes. I was so happy and in my mind I was already thinking of all the things I could write on my blog when I came home and how happy I was! At about 300m before I would hit 3km, I started to feel something, not pain, but something, in my hip. Right away I remembered how my mom told me to be careful and stop immediately when it hurt. I finished the run but after that, as I walked home, I started to feel something more and more growing in my leg. Not too much, and it wasn't pain, but I knew that if I had continued, I probably would have went back to square one. I walked all the way home and through the park on the corner of our street where I could see my mom, all happy, waving at me with a camera in her hands. She told me from far that I should run in order for her to take a picture of me in motion for the blog. I just shook my head and right away she knew I wasn't too happy. At that moment when I took off my shoes, I just couldn't hold back my tears. I was just so disapointed that after the hard work and exercises that I had done, nothing had seemed to improve for me. My mom called the physio and her friend who had gone through a similiar injury, but far worst, and talked with them to see if it were normal that I still felt something. It turned out that it was and that I shouldn't get discouraged. It was hard not to after thinking about the little improvment that I seemed to had made. I even had a soccer practice that very night and could still feel something in my leg. It was maybe at a 2 on a scale of 1-10. It has discouraged me ever since and I haven't gone running again. I'm just so scared that it gets worst or that I have to start over again. It really takes away the pleasure of running for me right now. I really badly wished I had never had this problem. But, I'm not giving up. Olivier hasn't, so why should I?

Olivier Gingras

I realize that I still haven't talked about the day I met Olivier on my blog yet. I mean, I've been so busy with friends, my injury, soccer and everything around me that I would always tell myself that I would leave it to the next day, then the next, then the next. All this time that I've been pushing this project aside and not raising any money, Olivier is still there, in his chair, exactly the same as when we left him. I feel so bad when I think of all the times I could've worked on my project but didn't. I realize now that the summer is almost over and I haven't even acheived half of my goal yet. It's time for me to wake up!
As I am writing this right now, I can feel my hands shaking a little and my heart beating faster when I picture the first time I ever saw him. We entered his house and he was in his wheel chair, sitting next to his brother who was playing video games. His mother greeted us with a big smile and seemed very happy! We walked into the house and sat down on the couch. I'm pretty sure at that moment I was looking at Olivier, shocked. He is literally a prisoner of his own body. I couldn't picture myself being where he was. I don't even think I can spend a day like that. We talked about my project and also a little bit of everything and anything. At some point, it's just as if I forgot he was the way he was. He is such a joyful human being, smiles all the time and can even laugh at himself and his whole situation. I really don't understand how he can be so happy after all that has happened to him and I admire him so much for that. I don't think I could ever be that happy if something like that ever happened to me.
We had a look at his room and he had this machine that could carry him into his bed. He also had a special bed to make sure he doesn't develop bed sores. Also, his whole room was adapted so he could easily move around with a bathroom also adapted for him. Obviously, without all of these adjustments, Olivier would not have been able to live with his family and would have lived in a hospital for the rest of his life. If Olivier and his family wouldn't have gotten the help from the foundation of "Les Gouverneurs de l'Espoir", he would not be living with his family at the moment. He would not have as much moral support for sure. I think it's enough that he has to deal with being quadriplegic for the rest of his life that being away from your family all the time is too much. Remember what I said earlier about him being such a joyful and happy person? Do you think that would have been possible if he wasn't living with his own family right now? I don't think so.
When we left his house after about 2 hours of talking, everything I did, I thought of Olivier and how he couldn't do any of it. He couldn't do the simplest things that we do on a regular basis. For example, just opening a car door, changing a song from your iPod or simply walking. It's just so unfair. Meeting Olivier Gingras made me want to become a better person and not having to worry about the little things and enjoying life, especially. You never know what can happen at any moment. It only took one bad dive to change the rest of his life. It motivates me that much more when I do my running or activites and I find it hard and want to give up because I think of him and how he would probably give anything to be in my shoes at that moment.
Some lyrics from the song Fix You, by Coldplay, I feel describe this exact situation and I would like to share them with you.
"An the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
...
And I will try to fix you"

Physio

I've been to the physiotherapist again Tuesday of this week. He said things were already getting better and I should be able to run soon enough if everything goes as planned! I also have to do some new exercises that he gave me to do, twice a day. Apart from my injury, my mom and I have talked about how I could run a half-marathon, but also run a few other races here and there like 5 or 10 kilometers. It would give me other oppourtunities to raise money and it would also make my project last much longer throughout the year. It isn't exactly sure that that's what I'm going to do but we might look deeper into that thought sooner or later.

Hot Summer Day

What a wonderful day to be working out! Although I can't run for 2-3 weeks, I can use my bicycle! I did 26km and it was just so smooth and fun! I wasn't with my sister like last time but, I did have my music which is always a plus. Even if it wasn't so hard on my cardio, it was hard on my legs! I'm pretty sure I developed some muscle ;) Here's a picture!

Updates!

I have quite a bit of things to tell you today! First of all, yesterday I ran 4km. Surprisingly, my hip still didn't hurt so much! Maybe a 2 on a scale of 1-10. On top of that, my mom had suggested that I shouldn't look at my watch too often so that I wouldn't have to stress with the time so that's exactly what I did. I also continued running 5 minutes and walknig 1. I ended up running at less than 5:30s per km... Maybe it was too fast but I really went with my feeling more than the speed. I also knew that if it hurt, I would have to stop. So, later on in the day, I went to my first appointment with the physio. He is or used to be the physio for the Montreal Alouettes. It didn't take long before he understood that the problem is that I play so many sports and always use the same muscles in my legs that they are getting too tired. Therefore, I have to develop other muscles so that it's not always the same ones that work and get tired. He gave me one exercise and one stretch that I have to do both 2 times per day. It already seems to be going in a good direction but, I'm not aloud to run for another 2-3 weeks. I'm strongly considering doing the Oka half-marathon instead since I would then have the time to complete my program. For now, I'm not sure exactly but we'll see how it goes. Here are some pictures of a little something I did today!

YES SIR!

This morning, I ran 7km. I can also say that my hip really didn't hurt that much! Running 5 minutes and walking 1 minute really does help I think. My final time was 42 minutes which means I ran quite fast. The worst part is, I didn't even look at my watch too much! I really just went along with my feeling and it turned out pretty good! Maybe now I can continue my program, but conitnue the 5 minutes of running and 1 minute of walking until my injury is completely gone. Overall, I was really happy about this morning and it shows me that there is still some hope!

One Step At A Time

After realizing that the injury would never just fade away, I ran my 4km today at a very slow pace. I also ran for 5 minutes than walked for 1 minute the whole way through. I'm pretty sure that helped a lot since my hip practically didn't hurt the whole way through. It was encouraging to see that even if I am injured and can't run at the same pace as I usually run, I can still just run to continue on with my program. I never want to completely stop running because it has become a part of my daily routine and what can I say, I just love it! I was watching the women's trialthlon in the London Olympics today and deep down inside of me I was like, hey, I would really like to do that one day. I love running and even though biking isn't the thing I love the most, I still do enjoy it. I also took swimming lessons when I was younger. It would be the thing that I would have to work on. I think I just enjoy pushing myself a lot. I like to be put into positions where I have to go beyond my capacities. But, the thing is, I don't necessarly want to compete in the Olympics or not even compete at all. I just know that one day I think I would like to participate in a triathlon. Maybe not an Iron Man ;) We'll see!

Facing Reality

This project isn't turning out as I had planned. I hadn't planned that I would be injured to the point that I couldn't run more than 3.3km. If you had told me 3 months ago that I would be injured this bad, I would have never believed you. It's so frustrating when the only thing stopping you from running isn't the distance, the weather or because you don't have enough cardio, but because your body cannot allow you to go on. Yesterday, the day after running my hills without facing any pain, I really thought I had pulled through my injury. So, I went out to run a slow 6km with my mom, something I would have been able to do without any problems not so long ago. After 3.3km, as I have mentioned before, my hip really started to hurt again to the point where it was really, really uncomfortable. Back at home, we found some things that I could do to treat my injury. My mom said, "it's going to be ok, it's only a matter of time". But the thing is, I just want to run. I would much rather not have to deal with this sort of thing. It really takes away from the joy of running. It really is unavoidable if I want to get things back to the way they were. The reality is, if I don't treat it now, it won't magically go away. One of the things my mom has suggested me to do to keep my cardio is cross training. I'll be doing aquajogging, biking, etc. Today, to start things off, I have climbed the Mont-St-Hilaire with my friends Genevieve Gagnon. It was actually really fun! We took the hardest path that lasted 4.2km. My hip didn't hurt at all the whole way through, which is good. Once we were at the top, the view was just absolutely AMAZING! Here are some pictures :)

The Hills

I ran my first hills today! Where I am in the program, we had to do 5 of them on 4km. My mom told me before we started that I should do the first hills in the program that I had never done which is 3 hills on 2.5km. So, I started off like that. After my 3 hills, I didn't feel much pain and knew I could continue and wanted to. I didn't force myself, it just happened! In the end, my hip was ok and I didn't even feel so tired. It was just a beautiful way to start off my day with my mom by my side. I love running with her because there never is any pressure and it's just very pleasant. Also, going back to the hills, I actually really enjoy doing them. It's different and adds something new to just running. I also always love some challenge, if you haven't noticed ;) Here are some pictures!

Going Up!

Going Down!

Hot Weather

Yesterday, I had to run a tempo 4km. I really had nothing else to do at all so I decided not to wait for my parents and run during the afternoon, the hottest part of the whole day. OHH MY GOD I WANTED TO DIE!!! I had never ran in such a terribly hot temperature! It was so bad that after 3km, I had to stop. I also didn't want to run another kilometer since my hip did hurt a little. But let's be honest here, the heat was the thing that crushed me. Now I understand why my parents always run either in the morning or at night in this kind of weather. I have learned my lesson!